God has always - without exception - been faithful to me! He has been faithful through all generations. I know this and have experienced this. I have no experiential reason to doubt this. Yet I still feel anxiety almost daily. WHY?
I read the Psalms daily and everyday God comforts and reassures me. Again, He is so faithful. So why do I keep feeling this way? Why can't I trust Him? Why can't I abide in Him? Why can't I rest in Him?
Honestly, I love living on the edge to some degree. I love taking calculated risks. That's part of why I love church planting. Sometimes I think I torture myself. I guess I have a love-hate relationship with myself. Church planters are my heros! They are missional entrepreneurs. They are risk takers. The one thing I know is that God is faithful and He continues to be faithful. Maybe my human condition is simply to keep me on my knees.
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