Protect Your Marriage While Church Planting

I'm back after taking a couple of weeks off. My recent reflections have been around the need to guard our marriages.

In church planting the work is never done! At the end of the day there are still more people to see, more details to cover, more strategy to plan, more projects to manage, and more ideas to create & develop. Plus we must always keep evangelism as a central focus, be discipling new and very immature believers, not to mention recruiting and developing more leaders. The work is never done.

Here's the issue: Can you say "no?"

Do you know when to stop? Are you monitoring the balance between work and family? Do you maintain enough margin in your life so that when those most critical relationships (e.g. spouse and children) need more time, attention, and energy from you - do you have the margin necessary to give them what they need without creating a crisis in the other areas of your life?

I have 3 suggestions:

1. Reflect and journal about this aspect of your life. Pay close attention and be brutally honest with yourself. Remember, we lie loudest when we lie to ourselves (Eric Hoffer).
2. Discuss it openly and honestly with your spouse. Give them permission and space to express fully their thoughts and feelings about this. Make sure you know their honest perception about how well you are present for spouse and family.
3. Discuss it with an accoutability partner. To be honest, sometimes our spouse is so committed to us and what we're doing that they are not honest with themselves about personal needs and desires that are going unmet. Have an outsider asking you tough questions and challenging you about your marriage and family.

Church planting is demanding! It is very hard work. But it is something we are passionate about; so passionate that sometimes we lose perspective about our personal reality. It's easy to become obsessed with our "mission."

Don't fool yourself and don't lie to yourself. Make sure you have a firm grip on reality in your marriage and family. Be intentional. Always be taking action to nurture and protect your marraige while church planting. What are you going to do today?